"Dreams"

Do you ever wonder what dreams mean? I have so many crazy dreams that I become overwhelmed and weary trying to figure them out. Mostly though, my dreams are not pleasant visions. I most often than not, will awaken frightened or filled with a dreadful expectantcy. Last night, I was in a vision of my family & I being in a lovely house with some sort of a reunion going on. I was apprehensive of letting anyone come or go through the back door though because there was a grizzly bear there, laying on the grass...just waiting. At one point, I had a toddler in my arms and Mr. Grizz attacked us and wanted the baby and I had to fight him. I woke up screaming as I was punching my free fist ontop of his head. Most upsetting start to my day, that is for sure. A few mornings ago I dreamed of a sniper outside our home and rippling off the walls and furniture were his bullets. What's that all about!? Why do we have these kinds of dreams? Is there something in our life that we need to take care of? That we need to talk about to a trusted source? It amazes me because during my waking hours I feel so happy inside. I feel content with my life and where I am in my faith, (although I would like to grow more in my faith), so...why the corny dreams?

It does begin to affect the health eventually though. Even though my spirit seems healthy during the daytime hours, I have noticed a dip in my health issues. I do suffer from many health ailments like Fibromyalgia, Osteoarthritis, IBS, Diverticulitis & Depression, but, I just feel weak & more tired than usual. My Pastor recommends praying over my dreams before bed and I must confess that I have not been doing so lately. I will get back on it tonight that is for sure.

Life can be so stressful and we seem to get caught up in the daily ritual of sleep; get-up; go to work; come home; eat; sleep. We forget to stop for a moment and embrace our very existance and be thankful for our lives. No wonder we are stressed...no wonder we dream the dreams that we do. Our poor little brains are working overtime trying to catch up on the multitasking of everyday existence. I received a lovely email the other day about a life in the "dirty thirties"...the Depression. It was a lazy pictured message with music. It described how poor life was, how they had to eat what they planted, they didn't have cars to travel, nor telephones to interrupt dinner time with the family or bible reading around the fire after dinner...and they were never happier. I felt such comfort and peace when I viewed this email. Maybe it was not as "lovely" as that for all people but obviously for some it was. I know that I do not lead as much a fast laned life as I did in 2001 when I was multitasker with 11 hour days, and I truly feel for those who must. It is even painful for me to make my own bed now, but, I cannot imagine myself out in the working world as I was before. I believe that is why I am where I am now. Also, I did not work alongside my depression years ago and I never talked to anyone about it so it got out of hand and I became bodily ill. Maybe my dreams would be sweet now if I had taken better care of "how" I took care of myself.

As I have stressed before in other postings on this site...share your heart with someone, smell the life that is in the air, listen to the choir amidst the trees...and laugh often. Life is so precious and you only have one on this earth so enjoy it. Forgive those who need forgiveness because you set yourself free more so than you set them free. Make a call to someone you haven't said "I love you" to in a while...or if ever, and say those three beautiful, war breaking, encouraging, and powerful words and just watch what greatness comes back to you. Your spirit will feel so enriched from this simple little act from your heart.

Even if our bodies begin to fail...our spirits can be as young as the first day they were created. I may not be able to make my own bed without a lot of struggle but I can reach out to you, the reader, and share with you my thoughts, my opinions, and pray that your spirit will be affected by even one sentence in any one of these postings. I can pray for you and I will listen.

I am only just a prayer away, today, tomorrow...and always

Glady

"My Miracle Cat"

All of my life I had been allergic to cats. As I got older the allergies became so severe that even if I stood next to a person who held their cat that morning I would have a fierce attack and have to head home from where I was and go right to bed with medication. This really prevented me from going places and it was a real pain to some people. Some of the cat owners would have preferred to put me outside instead of the cat...(if I dared go to their home at all). And then their were the people who did not believe I had it as bad as I would claim. It was a very trying time competing with the cats...most times the cats won. I am sure they would snicker a meow when they knew they wouldn't be thrown out because "she" decided to stay home. Sometimes I could have sworn that they were laughing at me!
Then one day a little "angel" bearing a miracle upon his fur came just for me! I was dealing with a great many issues in my life and this one night I received a phone call that needed attention immediately so I called my friend who lived in the same trailer court and asked if she could come with me. I waited outside for her at the end of my driveway. From the shadows came this raggedy old tom cat. My heart leaped at the sight of him because over the years I had become terrified of animals, but mostly cats, because I new what they could do to me. I shooshed at him to go away but he insisted on following me back and forth as I paced while awaiting my ride. No matter what I did, he continued to pace with me. I shrugged it off.
When I returned, I went to the back door and there he was...sitting at the threshold! Well...I sure told him off! He didn't run like I thought he would but at least he got up and went down the back steps, stopped and looked back at me with sad eyes and disappeared into the night.

The next morning he returned and the morning after that as well. My neighbor & I were outside talking "across the fence" and the cat mosied over to me and just looked up at me without saying a word. My friend had a fit and yelled for the cat to shoo but he ignored her and continued to look up at me. At that moment God whispered into my heart..."Touch this cat. You will not be allergic to it." I reached down and for the first time in 40 years I felt the silky fur of an animal. I was overcome with a mixture of feelings and I began to cry.

I took him in and aptly named him "Angel". We were inseparable. He didn't talk at all except when it was bedtime. Yup...he slept with me. Some months previous I had heart trouble and was in the hospital for 3 1/2 weeks until they could do the tests I needed. I had become very weak from it for quite some time and it was as though Angel knew when I needed rest and he would sound the alarm until I listened and off we'd go. He slept curled around my knees. I couldn't believe how utterly secure that felt. Sometimes I would cry and thank God for this wonderful gift He sent me.

I have many funny stories of my Angel and if you want to hear any please leave a post. All too soon, my Angel took sick and died in my arms. He had Cardio Myopathy which is heart problems . I only had him for 3 short months but those three months healed me in many ways. I still ache when I think of him and his total non-judgemental love for me and I get a painful lump in my throat, but, Angel opened the door for another cat into our lives..."Xena" is my sons cat. What a beauty. You see, my healing did not only involve me but my kids have never had a pet because of Mom's allergies. They are adults now and it is a real blessing for them that now they too can enjoy the love & devotion that a pet can bring.

God Blesses All Creatures Great & Small
"Blessings"

"A Poem"

“Wine Cooler”
My trip back home was long awaited
I crossed off every day
The bus ride there was a delight
Air-condition, movies, back I lay.
Now this is the good way to travel
No driving to worry about
It even has a “potty” in back
In case I’m not in drought.
I looked outside at passing trees
And thought about my bags
“Maybe I should have packed a coat
Cause all I brought were summer rags”.
The bus did stop at our roads end
I saw my cousins there
We embraced and I exclaimed
“It sure is hot and fair!”
We did things every day out side
And I melted bit by bit
My cousin said “She is tough”
“She’ll get over it!”
Our final day there was a tour
An age old winery place
It ended in the basement cooler
Even then I could feel my face!
I hid behind a stranger big guy
For if my cousin saw me
He would have made a spectacle
For all the world to see.

I could feel his eyes on me
I saw the look of laughter
Hear it comes, get out quick
Or I’ll hear it ever-after
It’s too late, I heard a voice
It bellowed in the basement
“Only you, my cousin girl
Could HOT-FLASH in cool encasement!”
Every single person there looked around to see
Who it was with Menopause
And bright red face…that’s me!
All I could do was smile back
At all the wine tour eyes
Silence filled the echo room
I must say something wise
But mental-pause tip-toed in
I couldn’t find a word
Instead, my mouth betrayed me big
My words were like lemon curd!
“It’s my menopause you see,
The heat has done me in.
My cousin put me on the spot
And now I’ll need some gin!”
Up the stairs I climbed as quick
As my swollen legs could go,
And in the wake of flying skirts
They laughed a “HO HO HO!”

by

Glady

Does This Blog Interest You?

Well, I must say that I am a little discouraged with this blog. I have just visited other blogs just to see how others have set up their sites and what they write about and I feel a little overwhelmed with the intelligence & experience they have penned in. Hmmm...I feel a little silly about the "greenhorn experiences" that I have written about and I will pray on whether I shall continue this blog or not. Any advice would be accepted dearly.

Bless you today, tomorrow & always

"A Pill Won't Help My Hurt"

Wouldn't it be nice if we could swallow a Tylenol for our heartaches? It would be so easy wouldn't it. But, unfortunately, that is not the way it is. When I think back of heartbreaks and how truly raw they made me as they tore at my inner being where love is formed, I cringe on the memory. How many times I thought my heart would cease to beat and my breath would still forever. I felt incredibly numb with the heartpain that fulfilled my chest. I actually kneeled while grasping myself as though all feeling left my legs and there was no strength in them to hold me up any longer and my tears were like a river flowing from my eyes. I thought I would just quit...just not care about tomorrow, whether it comes or not. Then, I curled up into the fetal position and as exhaustion surrounded me like a blanket, sleep came over me.
The next morning I was awakened by birds singing a melody I'd never heard before. Someone was mowing their lawn and the sound swooshed my memories back to when I was a child and I was playing skip rope on pavement, the sound of my black patten shoes scraped loudly and proudly against the sparsely graveled cement. Neighbours chatting made me think of my Mom and Aunts when they were together. In the distance I thought I heard my son and my daughter playing together in their youth. In her little girl's voice, my daughter was talking her big brother's ear off as she always did. Her brother was her hero.
Suddenly, I realized that I had not even thought of why I had slept in my clothes. I did not have the pain inside me that I thought I would surely die from, but now it was only an ache. Seeing and hearing all of these memories made my soul come to life rather than grieving something that had died. Life was so much more important than the loss of something on this earth because if I lost it then it wasn't mine to begin with. I do not mean the loss of a loved one, that is a whole different story, but, I am referring to a relationship mostly, I guess. I am relating to my experiences. As I have stated before in previous postings, I have had 2 failed marriages and two drastic relationships. I felt like such a failure after the last one a little over four years ago. But then, through my wonderful Christian Counselor I came to realise that it was not only me but it was also the "choice" I made because of where my self-esteem was at. My Christianity has been my bow & arrow of life now and I feel stronger now than I have ever been when I was married or with someone in my life. I am not saying that I wouldn't like to marry again one day, but, if I do, it will be God's choice for me...not mine. I am just sharing that I couldn't find a pill to help my heartbreak when it was present, but, I sure learned a great deal from it's pain. And once the clouds disappeared...it wasn't so bad. Thinking about all of the beauties in my life brought me back to earth and made me reconnect with reality that this is only one life I have here on this earth and even though there is pain I want to live through them and learn and become strong as I recover from each blow. I never, ever, walk through them alone because God is always with me.

Take Heart & Know That After The Storm There Is A Rainbow Of Beautiful Colors Waiting Just For You To Enjoy

"Im PMS-ing, I Have A Loaded Flashlight-Watch Out!"

Another watch neared. The weather was getting better so when Thursday nights neared the "young & the restless" wanted to get a head start on their weekend partying in the bush next to our property. There was one of our Seniors who was a little "different & very nosy" if I should put it mildly, and every so often I would find him outside smoking a pipe as he followed me from a distance. I would finally approach him and say as sweetly as I could, "Maybe you should go back to your suite Mr. M. because it just isn't safe to walk around at midnight anymore." "I can take care of myself!" he would snarl and walk off in a huff...and a puff.

This one particular night I was standing very still in the courtyard just taking in the beauty of the silence and the dreamy screen of stars across the heavens when I heard a distant sound of whispers. I slipped into the shadows of the building to investigate under cover. Sure enough, there were two people entering our grounds suspiciously bent over and trying to walk quietly, but I heard them long before they even arrived because I am a mother and I have caught many a "cookie thief" in my day! I made the call to the police on my cell and I was giving information to the Operator when suddenly the hairs on my neck raised up on stilts! Then someone whispered behind my ear..."Who are you talking to?"...After I picked myself up from a dead faint I could hear the faraway voice of the Operator..."What's happening? Are you there? Talk to me!" I turned to see who had snuck up behind me and looked into the face of our Mr. M. but this time he was without his pipe so I didn't smell him coming. I gave him a real good tongue wagging and told him to get back to his room and stay there! The Police arrived moments later only to find the visitors long gone. I made a formal complaint the next day that a notice should be given to Mr. M. that he remain in his suite during certain hours. I wanted to deliver it to him myself. I was going to enjoy putting the arrogant Mr. M. in his place...but, I would do so in a very diplomatic way of course.

"You can't tell me I can't leave my suite!"
"Oh yes I can, Mr. M. See this policeman's flashlight? See how heavy it is? This flashlight almost found it's way over your head last night! You never, never, sneak up on a middle-aged woman unexpectedly or you will suffer severe consequences. Do you understand, Mr. M.?"...
I never saw him out at night again.
Sometimes hormones can be a woman's best friend...hee hee

Blessings filled with laughter today, tomorrow...and always

"What Is Easter To You?"

You may be planting Easter eggs for your little ones just as I did when mine were young. But, once my heart began questioning the real meaning of Easter, I wanted to learn more about our furry little fellow who announced the coming of Easter. Then I watched "The Passion of the Christ"

This moved me beyond words. To me, there was no longer any doubt that the Easter Celebration had nothing to do with rabbits...it had to do with the Crucifixion of Jesus on Good Friday and Easter Sunday He rose from death and His spirit was seen by many. He remained on Earth and taught many people before He ascended to his Father in Heaven. He promised us that He would return.

If you are searching for unanswered questions, if you have a hole inside your stomache that feels like it will never be filled, if your heart aches for something that you don't understand...please, watch The Passion. It may give you some idea what He did for you at Easter. It may change your life for the better.

I have no idea where or when the bunny came in and I will probably never try to find out. I, also, will not discontinue buying easter bunnies & chocolate eggs for my loved ones, but I know what my heart believes now and I feel fulfilled. It could have been me up on that cross but instead Jesus said..."Take me instead of her. I will die for her sins if you spare her." Now, it is up to me to accept the gift He gave me...or turn away. I have done a lot of things in my life that I regret deeply but since I came to understand that Jesus gave me a chance to make it right by taking my place I have asked forgiveness to God and will now lead a life following the footsteps of the man who took my place! To me...that is a Happy Easter because it brings hope to the lost, healing to the sick and direction to better, cleaner paths of life.

I would like to close off by sharing one Easter memory when my kids were young.

We were all together at my then husbands parents home for Easter. By this time the youngest, my nephew, was about 4 years old and our children were older. Over the years we had become experts at fooling the children with "rabbit footsteps in the flowerbed by the window, Santa's footsteps beside Rudolphs hoof prints and on and on. Well, this particular morning the children got up filled with excitement that the bunny had left special things just for them. The youngest was especially excited because it was the first year he really understood about the easter bunny. As they began their hunt we adults stood back and watched. Our hearts filled with warmth at the excitement of each child as they found a hidden egg. One child said..."Boy, that Easter Bunny sure is tricky. He really hid them good!"...And then the father of another child said...

"Yep!...we were up really late hiding those eggs !"
A quiet came over the children like a dead calm.

BOOM! Just like that the excitement of a "real bunny" was gone except from the little guy. It is different with Jesus though. If your heart believes in Him you will never doubt. All you have to do is look around you and see the changes He has made in many lives.

So, I wish you a very Happy Easter of "new beginnings and wonderous hope for your future"...today, tomorrow...& always

"Night-Time Security"

When we had a tragic event at the Center, which hit the Television News, the Board of Drectors hired round the clock security. After 1 full year they came to realize that the worst was over and that they could no longer afford the 12 hour night-time watch...so they hired me! Four nights a week from 9:00 pm to 1:00 am.

The Seniors knew me and trusted me (except for the one who thought I stole her left runner & raw piece of chicken of course), more than anyone else on the grounds so I was hired. I began my shift after all my day-time jobs were done. My rounds consisted of patrolling around the whole outside area of the Center. It was a lot of ground to cover which was not a problem to me but the back part was a little unnerving because it was all bush that led to the bird santuary.

The bushed area was also used for the street people during the summer months and for party people. Then there was Mr. Bear who loved the bushes where he would find his berries and plants...and at the back door (which had about 10 feet of lawn before the main building and the bush met) he had a gourmet meal of all sorts, from the "Smythrite Cafe" garbage can at the back door entrance, just right for the pickings!

I usually took 3 or 4 rounds of the whole building lot during my 4 hour shift. I took the same amount inside the buildings. It didn't make for a lot of extra free time. Often, I would find other things that would surface, like, the gentleman who refused to lock his door and leave it wide open and another would leave his motorized cart outside with the keys in it. One night, around 1:00 a.m. darling Mr. B. was wondering around outside because he thought it was daytime. This could have proven to be very dangerous to his well being because we had on 2 occassions had two Senior gentelmen robbed & beaten by a gang. I took Mr. B. back to his room several times a week until he had to be placed into securer environment. One of the special ladies would bake me cookies and bring me hot chocolate! Yet another would join me in walking the grounds for a few laps before his bedtime. Mr. A. would look out her bedroom window just before sleep and I made it a point to be there to wave to a goodnight.

One night, Mr. Bear and I came (almost) face to face! I might mention that 5 miles is close enough for me! It was time for my last round and all was quiet around the beautiful grounds. The sky was clear, the stars twinkled brightly. I could see my breath in front of me on this clear October night. I donned my gloves one more time, flashlight in hand, voice activated cell-phone attached and open for action, whistle on my left wrist and keys attached to my belt loop on my elastic key chain...'Here we go.'...I thought. I was anxious to get home and have a hot bath and crawl into my snuggly bed. Being careless with the thought that throughout my last 3 rounds previous, all was well...I didn't look around first before I walked away from the door letting it close behind me (because our doors closed and locked automatically). I was about 30 feet from the locked door when I heard a noise from the dreaded left hand side of me...where the garbage can was! Yup! Mr. Bear! He stopped munching and looked at me and I looked at him but only for a moment. In fact, all I remember is shakily fighting to get the key in the door on the South end of the building when we had met on the North side! After I safely closed the door, I sat on the stairwell, trying desperately to quiet my racing heart and gasping breath. I said a little prayer to myself..."Please God, don't let anyone have seen that!" The next serious problem was...how am I to get to my car! My car was parked somewhat between the place where Mr. Bear and I locked eyes! Needless to say, after much investigation before leaving my post, I made it to my car.

Oh how I miss them! One of the best times in my life was when I was with the Center for that ten years. Many wonderful memories.

God Bless You Today, Tomorrow ...& Always

"More Of Jane"

During my days at the Senior's Center I filled up on so many hysterically funny situations that I knew at some point I would write about them. Things such as these must be shared with people because "laughter is the best medicine". I have written some short stories for Chicken Soup For The Soul because I really want these stories to bring even one smile to a face or one feather light feeling of warmth.
I was at the Center for 10 full years. Not all was happy. There was a time when one of our tenants came to us as a widow and she never failed to tell me how many servants she had. One day she found out that my then husband worked for the Government and she said..."WHAT! But, he is such an educated man and you are just a housekeeper!" I kept a stiff upper lip, smled and said "Shocking isn't it." and I walked downstairs to the bathrooms...and cried! Oh yes, good times and bad times. One lady accused me of stealing her left runner, size 9 1/2. The Cobbler later called and said that she had left her left runner there for weeks and would she come pick it up. She was 80 and sweetly forgetful. Next, she blamed me for her missing piece of raw chicken. I finally took my Boss's advice and learned to laugh over these such instances otherwise I would break.
My Co-Worker, the handyman, who was also the Manager of the Center and lived on-site, was my buddy. He was about 70 and a real sweetie. We had lots of laughs together. I had recently found one of our Seniors near death in his suite and so this had made me a little on edge because we had been told by "our handyman" that he also was ill. He had throat cancer. We were devastated! One day, I had my tray of cleaners and was on my way to the outer laundry rooms. I passed by our supply room when I quickly looked inside and there was Bob laying on his back with the upper half of his body underneath the laundry tub! "
BOB...BOB!...OH MY GOSH!...BOB!" I grabbed on to his legs and yanked!
"WHAT THE HECK ARE YA DOIN'!"...he yelled! He was underneath the tub fixing a drip! I didn't know our sink had a leak!
Anyway, that is your giggle for the day. I answer all emails if you so wish to write.
Bless you today, tomorrow...& always